You want a natural birth but everyone is telling you birth horror stories, the videos you have seen have women screaming and hating their husbands, and the childbirth teacher at the hospital seems to think pain medication is inevitable? Are you fooling yourself in thinking that you can have a natural birth?

There is plenty of information about childbirth available in books, online, and through stories we hear. The problem is that not all available information will empower you to achieve a natural birth. Much of it is actually negative, disempowering information that tells you what interventions are likely to be performed on you or your baby, and how you are of course going to want “the epidural.”

“If you do what everyone else does, you’ll get what everyone has. If you want something different you need to do something different.”

What is everyone else doing?

If you are like most women in western culture you will present yourself to your physician saying, “I think I am pregnant.” You will then be sent for blood tests and be told what to do until you are referred to an obstetrician. Your prenatal visits, each lasting about 5 minutes, will continue this way throughout the pregnancy. At each visit you will be told what to do; there is little discussion as to what you want for prenatal testing and screening, or whether you even want any testing in the first place. When you ask questions you will be told you read too much or not to worry, “they” will take care of everything. When you express your desires for a natural delivery you will be told of course you can “try” to give birth naturally.

You will then read “What to Expect When You Are Expecting,” watch TLC’s “The Birth Story,” and register for the hospital’s birthing class. They will tell you when to show up at the hospital, when you will be able to get your epidural, and how the hospital stay will go.

You will be told birth horror stories or stories of how great the epidural was from people at work, friends, family, and strangers on the bus. Epidurals were given, waters were artificially broken, pitocin was dripped, and episiotomies were cut. Their babies were pulled out manually, with forceps, by vacuum, or by cesarean. They saw their babies for the first time only after they were poked, prodded, cleaned, and dressed.

Is that what you want for your birth experience?

If you want something different you need to create something different. There is another side to childbirth and it is within your power to achieve it. You just need to get information, support, and model people who have achieved the birth you want for you and your baby.

What are the 4 Keys to Achieving a Natural Birth?

1. Surround yourself with women who have had empowering birth experiences.

There are many women out there who have had great birth experiences and will be willing to share them. You can find them through referrals from doulas and midwives, through childbirth educators, or on natural birth forums and meet-ups. Have them tell you their birth stories: what they did to prepare themselves for birth, who they had at their birth, where they chose to give birth, what was their emotional experience of birth. Modeling and mentoring are important ways to achieve goals. You can benefit from the birth experiences of other mothers around you so you can set yourself up for the same outcome.

2. Read books that teach you how to trust yourself, your body, and the birth process.

There are many books that discuss natural childbirth. Read the best of the best such as “Ina May’s Guide to Childbirth,” “Childbirth without Fear,” “Gentle Birth Choices,” and “Immaculate Deception.” These books explain how and why natural childbirth is the best option for your baby, how you can achieve a birth without intervention, and dispel the myths about the superiority of medically managed birth.

3. Watch movies and videos that show what natural birth is really like.

The visual blueprint you have in your head is important for you to draw on both when you are visualizing yourself giving birth as well as when you are going through your labor and delivery. We have been programmed with visual images of birth from TV and movies. It is important to replace those with positive images of women birthing naturally in their own power. These images will give you something positive to draw on while you are birthing your baby. You can find beautiful births online, just make sure you are watching the good ones, by looking for those that have been posted to natural birthing websites. There are also wonderful documentaries discussing natural birth such as “The Business of Being Born” and “Orgasmic Birth”. These are great to watch with your family so they too can understand why you are making the choices you are making and how these choices are best for your baby.

4. Attend a childbirth class outside the hospital that focuses on natural birthing.

There are many natural childbirth classes available. If there are none in your community you can find online prenatal classes. Look for classes that focus on empowering you to birth naturally. You need to choose classes that will help you understand what happens in the hospital so you know how to choose from the interventions that you are presented with. The class should also give you the tools that you will need to avoid those interventions, and to know when choosing them is right for you. It should be focused on trusting birth, yourself, and the strategies that will get you to the desired outcome.

“Being pregnant and giving birth are like crossing a narrow bridge. People can accompany you to the bridge. They can greet you on the other side. But you walk that bridge alone.” ~African proverb

You have within you all the power and resources you need to give birth to your baby naturally. Following through with “The 4 Keys to Achieving a Natural Birth” will prepare you for the incredible journey you are on and will guide you across the bridge to motherhood.

You are invited you to receive the free audio download “How to Create the Best Birth for You and Your Baby” by clicking here http://yourbirthcoach.com/your-birth-coach-video-of-birth-best-birth-prenatal-class-childbirth-courses-resources/

Dr. Nancy Salgueiro, Your Birth Coach, has been empowering women through natural childbirth since 2002.